Snow Kiss
by Rainbow-Akuma-Revolution
Summary: Tyki's always had a problem with memorys, and after being damaged by allen it seems there is more missing than his family would care to admit. There are some storys that should be left burried regardless of curiosity. Contains much guess work on the past of the noahs and YAOI (TykixAdam(earl's human form) and past AdamxNeah(possible other pairings later.)
1. Chapter 1- Accidents

**As a quick reminder to the setting of my story and later chapters, Adam is in HUMAN FORM unless otherwise stated. If anyone is questioning his integrity or future insults by Tyki, they are mostly about his MASK FORM and should not be taken as a physical description beyond chapter 1. Thought I'd clear that up in case that get's confusing during fights or inevitable smutt. Yes, i see his character as athletically built, like EVERY OTHER MALE in this series regardless of age,(the wiki says he's somewhere between 28 and 34, the same age range as Krory, Komui,and Bak, still bellow cross and sheryl, and is describe as hansom so at least wiki believes me...) sue me for making the most powerful person in the series attractive when hoshino had never given a cannon shirtless, damn you hoshino...  
**

**Excuse my rant i just wrote a chapter where this is somewhat relevant, and i have read enough peoples thoughts on other peoples yaoi's with Adam to know what haters will do. **

**Tyki is sexy as always~**

**Thank you for ready, and PLEASE COMMENT. **

_**"Closing my eyes as night falls on me,**_

_**I recall one simple memory.**_

_**Biting my frozen lips,**_

_**I gatther my strength.**_

_**Hiding the memory of the last day,**_

_**I saw you deep inside.**_

_**That last day we wandered along the lake,**_

_**the wonderful view we saw.**_

_**"Please don't do this.**_

_**Don't say goodbye to me."**_

_**Kissing amid the falling snow you begged.**_

_**The starry sky looks so beautiful I'd love for time to stand still.**_

_**Oh, how i wish to see you."**_

**-Snow Kiss(English lyrics)**

_My arm was pulled rather enthusiastically away from town, my body following shortly after._

_ "__We're almost there brother, just up that hill!" My older brother looked back and grinned at me, my short 6 year old legs having trouble keeping up with his 8 year old ones._

_ "__Are you sure it's ok we're out here? Won't dad yell at us if he catches us?" I replied._

_"__IF he catches us, Joi-pet." We reached the top of the hill. "He won't see us from here trust me."_

_ "__Why do you call me that?" I mumbled under my breath "I don't like it it's weird in public…."_

_ "__Who's gonna hear us out here? We're in the middle of nowhere, Joido." He looked back out over the ridge, towards the slowly setting sun in the distance. "See that place on the ridge that's glowing? That's where father is." He pointed._

_I looked down to the ridge where his finger extended, and there it was, a spot in the mountain that swam with colors like liquid metal, barely visible from the shocking red of the sun. _

_ "__Adam, why is it glowing like that? Is dad alright?" I looked fixed at the tiny glowing spot from behind my brother, oddly drawn to it._

_ "__He'll be fine, it's sorcery. Dad meets with others like him every few years, they've only met twice that I've seen, but every time when night falls colors stream together in the hills, and then- well you'll see if you keep watching." He smiled broadly at me, nudging me in front of him. _

_"__Well why didn't you bring Toraido then? He's older than I am." I looked up at my brother confused._

_ "__I tried once, but he refused to sneak out with me. He just always clings to mom. He's no fun at all with how quiet he is. You're different Joido. You're a rebel, and you wanna do fun stuff like I do. That's why you're here and not Toraido." He responded._

_ "__What's a rebel?" I asked curiously. I had never heard that word._

_"__Someone who wants to break the rules and enjoy themselves despite what other people think. They really don't care about the world, just themselves, and each other of course." He said._

_ "__A rebel…." I whispered. I liked the sound of that word, and a small smirk came across my face. Just as it did the sun set, and the colors swan into the sky from the earth, dancing before my eyes like nothing I'd ever seen. It was as if the whole world had melted just for this moment, when suddenly they began to fade, and darkness came over me. I struggled to make a sound, but no noise came from my mouth._

_ "__I'm falling, is this it?" I closed my eyes tightly, waiting for impact. "I'm going to die."_

Suddenly my eyes sprung open, staring upward at a blank white ceiling high above me. I held my head in shock.

"What a weird dream….could it have been….a memory?" I pressed myself to remember the dream but all I got where fragments of color and voices I did not recognize.

"Guess there's no point in dwelling on it…." I looked up at the tall elaborate clock at the end of the room. "I'm gonna be late for my light sides job if I don't hurry." I quickly sat up, changed back to my street cloths and headed to Roads room.

"Hey road, I need you to open a gate to Europe, I can't exactly get there in ten minutes from Japan." I waited outside the door.

She opened it, still in her pajamas with a sleepy look on her face "Why should I do that Tyki-chan? I'll only do it if you'll play with me later." She smirked.

"Why should I do that, I don't have time for babysitting…." I looked off unamused. "Can't you get someone else to play with you?"

"No, I want to play with you Tyki! Is it so bad that you'll have to come back here tonight, or would you rather get fired from your day job?" She leaned into me on her toes, as if she could somehow make herself tall enough to get in my face.

"Fine fine, just open me a gate. I'll be back after my shift, alright?" I replied exhaustedly. I was not in the mood for Roads childlike behavior right now.

_"__Why is the one of us with the least responsibility in control of our movements besides The Earl anyway? It makes no damn sense…." _I thought.

"Alright then Tyki-Mik~" she smiled "Be back soon I'll have lots of things for us to do by then." She opened the portal in front of me, and I gulped a little nervous on what bizarre games she'd come up with for later. I'd have to find some way out of it.

"Right, see you then." I stepped through the heart shaped door, light spilling out from the other side of the world. Outside I saw the mine I worked at in the distance, along with the house I usually stayed at and a few men outside heading out to work. I closed the door quickly behind me and stepped out of the alleyway, lighting a cigarette from the box I kept in my pocket.

"It never gets old, having a human life." I smirked a bit, running out towards a pair of my co-workers.

_"__Even though it's a total lie" _I thought.

Later that night I waved the few friends I had off and began to head towards a safe spot to transfer to the ark. As usual, a few of the asked why I wasn't staying the night, and as I usually did, I responded that I had another job to do, and that it'd be very difficult for me to stay.

"You should hook us up." One of them spouted. "I could use the extra money." He laughed.

Another piped in "Yeah me to! If your boss ever needs a hand give us a shout alright?"

"Yeah sure." I said, a false smile spreading across my face. They had no idea what they were saying. If they knew, well, I wouldn't be here anymore. Little did they realize that one of our own workers, the quiet one at the back of the crowd already did, looking at the shouting man curiously. He looked at me and smiled.

"Level 2's…." I whispered under my breath. I'd have to have him removed from camp, or my human life could be in jeopardy. In the back of my mind I wondered if the earl had sent him here to spy on me.

_"__No, he can't be that obsessive…." _I thought. He trusts me more than that. I hope.

With a quick flick of the key I had stolen from road I opened a door to a room in the ark, white sunlit corridors and fresh flowers on every turn.

"You know, all the times I've been here and I have no idea who maintains this place…." I pondered "I guess it's probably akuma, but I don't see any."

I knew at this point I was trying to ignore the obvious fact a hyper-active road would be waiting for me the instant I turned my key in the next door. I really didn't want to go home.

"But if I don't she'll be worse next time…." I lit another cigarette. "Guess I should get it over with…." I opened one of the doors, stepping into the front entrance of Sheryl's house.

_"__and if roads unhappy so is Sheryl, and that's a death sentence." _I thought menacingly.

Oddly enough as I entered the house no crazy flying girl struck me, nor did my brother Sheryl barrage me with questions. As I stepped further in it appeared as if the house was completely empty.

"I thought I was supposed to come here….this is just great I should have stayed back with the guys then." I looked around the near empty house far too large for the few people who lived in it. "I could use a shower though before I leave." I said.

I climbed up the stairs and thought with a smirk _"at least I don't have to play with road tonight. Maybe I can actually finish my book for once instead of being dragged off somewhere." _

I pulled my shirt off tossing it over the railing, heading to the top floor. As I reached the top of the stairs I could have sworn I heard water running, but I ignored it.

"It's probably nothing." I mumbled under my breath.

I turned the corner only to be proven utterly wrong as I smacked hard right into something, or some_one, _quickly sticking my hands out to guard. As I looked up a man stood not inches from me at eye level wearing nothing but a towel, the stunned look on his face nothing short of panic. My body was pressed up against his just for a second before tripping back from him on my heels.

"Who the hell?!" I yelled eyes wide with shock.

"Tyki?" the man said stepping back as well, body in a readied fighting stance. "Oh it's just you…"

"Just me? How do you even KNOW me?" I looked over the man, seeing if maybe I knew him, but nothing about the man in the towel looked familiar. He just seemed like an ordinary, though fairly athletic looking guy in his late twenties with shoulder length brown hair. "Why are you in my house?!".

n"_Your_house? You can't possibly be that arrogant….wait a minute, you seriously don't recognize me do you? I don't know whether I should be offended or glad about that actually…." The man drifted off looking away from me.

"….Why would i?" I replied. Who did this guy think he was?

"Tell you what; I'll give you three guesses. If ya can't guess it THEN I'll be offended." He smirked a little, crossing his arms.

I tried to calm myself from the sudden intrusion "All right I'll bite. I like humans with a little bit of balls. Thing is that as long as you're a person I'm still going to kill you." I looked at him nonchalantly. "So I doubt it matters."

"So sure about that are we?" he grinned, though this time I could sense a bit of sickness behind it that seemed faintly familiar. "Well go on then." He gestured. "Guess.".

I narrowed my eyes. I actually had no idea who he was. He wasn't a follower, they wouldn't risk coming here, and akuma are more obedient. Defiantly not an exorcist or finder, unless they were crazy; I twitched a little.

"You know, on second thought I'm just gonna kill you. I haven't ripped someone's innards out in a while and I'd hate to miss an opportunity." I smiled sadistically, lunging forward to his chest with my choice ability gunning for his heart.

In the split second I had reached out I was on the ground my arm twisted backward with a foot pressing down on the back of my neck.

"Sorry tyki-pet, but I don't have a heart to rip out even if that attack had succeeded. Your human life has made you slow." He pulled my head up by my hair causing me to wince. "I can't believe you'd consider attacking ME of all people, anyway. I might just fire you for this, yaknow." He dropped my head and pressed down on my neck with his foot, cracking it painfully before letting me go.

"E-earl?!" I stammered quickly righting myself to a sitting position despite the pain in my neck.

"Yes, it's me. I'm surprised you didn't recognize me from my charming smile." He said sarcastically, giving me a toothy grin. "Sheryl and Road are out tonight. I'm the only one home. I wasn't expecting you."

"I wasn't expecting you either! Not like- like this…." I looked down my face growing hot, though I couldn't have told you why.

He kneeled down to where I sat getting way to close for comfort, an amused look in his gold eyes. "You mean human?" he said calmly. "I admit I don't take my work cloths of much but I'd hope you'd at least remember what I look like." He rolled his eyes. "As I said before, my weight is _fine_. You, however, are STILL a hobo." He smirked.

I pushed him away, embarrassed. "I am NOT a hobo! I live here don't I? Besides you still _dress _like that. That makes it even creepier."

"and you _choose _to be a moneyless tramp." He stated. "That still doesn't explain why you didn't recognize me."

"How could I? You don't even sound the same!" I glared at him.

"What would be the point of a mask if I still sounded the same?" he replied. "Besides my voice just came with the curse it's not like I picked it."

I narrowed my eyes "curse?".

"Never mind about that." He stood up abruptly. "Unless you were performing a strip tease I'd assume you were planning to take a shower as well, correct tyki-pet?" he scanned me over with his eyes for a second. "The waters still running and I have work to do." He brushed past me and headed down the stairs before I got a chance to talk to him, his head lowered like he was trying to hide his face in embarrassment. I felt the same heat in my face as earlier as I watched him walk down the stairs, but I shook it off.

"I'll never understand that guy." I said, heading off to take my shower.


	2. Chapter 2- Teaze

_**"Come on, and show them your love **_  
_** Rip out the wings of a butterfly**_  
_** For your soul, my love**_  
_** Rip out the wings of a butterfly**_  
_** For your soul**_

_** This endless mercy mile **_  
_** We're crawling side by side **_  
_** With hell freezing over in our eyes **_  
_** Gods kneel before our crime."**_

**-Wings of a Butterfly(H.I.M.)  
**

A couple of days later I returned to that house for a dance Sheryl had planned. I was still pretty sore from my fight with Allen, and I wasn't really looking forward to it. Though I was willing to play the formal role I had to it was all an act for me. It felt so ridged, but everyone around me seemed to think it was natural. When I really thought about it he was right, I _was _a street rat, and I liked it that way.

Since I was a noah, and an attractive one at that swooning young women seemed to follow me in packs; parents quietly talked amongst themselves about marriage between myself and their kids to get an edge in our tight little family. I had no interest, though occasionally I'd offer a dance to the more pretty of the lot simply for the hell of doing something. If I was lucky I might get laid without anyone making a scene out of it, though usually someone did, and Sheryl constantly trying to get me engaged didn't help. I couldn't understand my brother's fixation on that, but he was desire. Power, money, and a fancy house with a wife and…._loving daughter,_ where things he greatly strived for. He couldn't understand the fact that that wasn't near what I wanted.

I glared up at the upper tiers of the house _knowing _most of my family was either hiding or forced not to come. I was actually jealous of them, people like jasdero, devit, and lulu, and even Earl, skipping out on this event for one reason or another. My boss was still close though. It was kind of funny, he loved formal events like this, or at least I would imagine, and up till a few days ago I wouldn't have been surprised why he chose not to. Now that I knew what he really looked like though, I wondered why he wouldn't. At the very least he could take my place on the forefront of unwanted marriages. Then I could sneak through the crowd and back to my guest room where I could read, or maybe even pick up a few ladies from the dance floor and enjoy my evening.

After hours of acting the many followers we had accumulated finally began to clear out. I slumped down on the couch exhausted.

"Screw my light life, I'm sleeping here…." I sprawled myself out, the ticking clock chiming for 3 am. Within minutes I was asleep.

_I crossed my arms upset, looking angrily up at the tall man in the top hat who had kidnapped me. _

_ "So what if I run off sometimes to go back to my old life? You're not my parent you can't tell me what to do!" I protested._

_ "You never had parents. I know this is difficult for you Trent, but you can't keep running. You need to re-harness your abilities first." He replied._

_ "Well I don't wanna. I'd rather practice my gambling with my friends." I turned away, pulling out the card deck I had found a couple years ago, looking down at it frustrated. It had been the only thing I had owned for a long time. _

_ The man looked over at me with an odd expression, and before I could turn the man reached out towards me, snatching the deck from my hands._

_ "HEY! Those are mine give them back!" I ran up to the man angrily pounding on his chest, but he held the deck far above his head and pushed me away from him with his other hand._

_ "….No." the man looked at me expressionlessly, and then looked at the cards. _

_ He wrapped his hands around them and mumbled something under his breath. A beam of light burst from his hands, and when he opened them the cards were gone. In its place was a pure black butterfly, calmly sitting in the palm of his hand. _

_ "W-what did you do to my deck?!" I stared shocked at the little creature in his hands._

_ The man looked up at me and smiled lightly. "Oh nothing." He raised his hand and the butterfly took off and landed on my head. _

_ "What am I supposed to do with a butterfly?" the creature crawled off my head and onto my shoulder. "Why did you do this?"._

_"To teach you a lesson." He smirked. "Find an entire deck worth of butterflies and we'll talk about getting your real deck back." He turned and began to walk away._

_ I looked at the little creature that had now crawled to my hand, the markings of a heart of spades on its wings. I glared at the man._

_ "You're such a tease! You never give me a straight answer about anything! Nothing you do makes sense." I yelled._

_ He looked back over his shoulder for a second, his gold eyes narrowed to slits. "Tease….yes I like that name. That's what it'll be called. You and your tease better get looking if you want to gamble again in this lifetime. I've got work to do." And before I could protest he was gone, like he'd never been there at all._

_ "Tease…." I scoffed "what a stupid name for a butterfly"._

"Why does he always use that excuse….?" I whispered as my eyes desperately tried to remain shut against the sunlight coming through the window.

As the sunlight creeped into them the memory of my dream was driven back, and by the time they were open I had forgotten everything except the black butterfly.

"Why was I dreaming about my tease?" I sat up lazily, summoning one of them to my left hand. "Are you so hungry your taking my dreams away now?" .

It did not answer, opening its wings in silence.

"Not that I'd expect you to talk back to me…." I rolled my eyes. "I need a break. That last fight with Allen is starting to mess with my head….". I thought back to the pain of Allen's sword slicing through my noah-hood, a sharp sting traveling through my scars. "Or maybe I just shouldn't think about it at all." I smirked bitterly trying to make the pain stop. I heard footsteps coming down the stairs.

"You're one of three people. Please don't start with "R"." I fell back on the couch dramatically, closing my eyes tight despite the blinding sun.

"No. Since its noon "R" is at school and "S" is stalking her. "J" and "D" are passed out somewhere from drinking and "L" is actually doing her job. "A" is still here though. 3." He walked over, leaning over the arm of the couch and blocking the light from my eyes. "It seems "R" is still mad you didn't play with her though. You should check a mirror." I opened my eyes a crack just to see if the smirk I heard in his voice was real.

"Well fuck…." It was, and now that I thought about it I could just _feel _the heated marks of permanent marker etched into my face. "This is exactly why I don't sleep at home…." I mumbled.

He laughed. "At least it's not a hangover, but you still look ridiculous." He grinned wider.

"Oh your one to talk about ridiculous, I'm gonna wash this off." I stood up groggily making my way to the bathroom brushing past my older brother without much notice.

"Yes I am. I work and live around ridiculous every day." He replied. "You're included in that, and so am I."


	3. Chapter 3- Adam

After about twenty minutes of scrubbing foul language, genitalia, and a number of weird scribbles off my face I went back down stairs;I changed into more casual cloths instead of my formal attire from last night which I had slept in. I could still see a bit of black smudged on the corner of my lip that I couldn't get off no matter how hard I scrubbed, but I ignored it assuming no one would notice.

When I got back down stairs there was my boss, for the second time that week, nearly naked. This time it was boxers. I was actually surprised they didn't have little pink hearts on them, but the idea that I had thought about what kind of underwear my male older sibling and boss wore disturbed me on more levels than it was worth.

"Are you trying to show yourself off or something?" I looked at him sarcastically.

"Maybe I am and maybe I m not. If you don't like it you don't have to stay. I'm not changing. Besides I don't have any clean cloths. In fact, I usually don't wear cloths much at all come to think of it…." He replied.

"Yes you do. I never saw you even close to nude till 2 days ago." I looked at him skeptically.

He looked back at me as if I were a cat that had learned to use the toilet. "You know, my mask form has a default setting in case I'm naked, so I NEVER have to wear anything." He smirked "but of course you knew that." He grinned cruelly.

My eyes widened. I knew for a fact I would NEVER un-see that image. "….never mind." I said trying not to think about it, that hot feeling coming over me again. _"Why the hell does THAT make me feel all hot?" _I thought bitterly. Maybe I was getting sick or something.

"Anyway, I'm gonna make breakfast. Do you want something or would you rather just eat out of our neighbor's koi pond?" he said sarcastically.

I smirked a bit "well if you not making _sushi_ again sure."

He rolled his eyes "Oh ha-ha real funny. I have no idea why I bother taking care of you or anyone besides road in this house for that matter."

"That's still not an answe-"he cut me off.

"NO" he said stomping off frustrated.

_"Well looks like I win this time. 1 to 1 now."_ I thought snidely.

Despite our prior conversation we ate in silence. There really wasn't much to talk about. On top of that something about seeing him human, acting so normal, it was as if an unseen barrier had been broken. I shouldn't know. Yet there he was on the other side of the couch just like me.

Up until finding out I hadn't really thought of him as "human", and something about it was incredibly disturbing that I couldn't quiet put my finger on. When I thought about it too much my head began to ache. I knew it shouldn't be that big of a deal, but it was.

"Are you alright?" he looked over at me setting his plate down on the table.

My mind snapped out of its train of thought and stared back startled. "Oh no I'm fine…." I looked down at my plate. _"What the hell is wrong with me? I do this kind of thing with him ALL THE TIME."_ But I knew it was different now. I just didn't know why.

"It's just…." He trailed off lost in thought for a moment "You've been acting very strange recently. Has something happened?"

"You could say that." I replied, trying to get off the awkward topic before it got worse.

"This is about me being human, isn't it?" he looked at me solemnly.

"What? No no, Adam it's-" I stopped. _"Adam? Why did I call him Adam?" _I thought panicked. _"This is just great my brain is falling apart…."_

"What did you just call me?" a look of stunned euphoria crossed his entire body. "Don't tell me- you, you remember…." .

I could have sworn I saw tears at the edge of his eyes, but I wasn't entirely sure. I had hit a nerve somewhere, and I felt something twinge inside me to, but I ignored it.

"No I d-mh!" I couldn't move.

His back was arched over me, my hands pinned behind my head as he kissed me passionately, the sudden clash of flesh leaving me bewildered and confused. Part of me really wanted to know what was going on, and _why, _but the majority of me didn't want to move anymore, like my muscles had melted away to nothing and all I could do was feel this moment without opinion or remark. He managed to slip his tongue past my lips, my mouth weakly accepting it as it tangled with mine, a familiarity crossing over me that was almost frightening. For a moment I was lost in the sweet taste of his mouth and the fast pounding of my heart when reality returned as he slid his hand up my frail nightshirt. I pushed away quickly with my feet crawling onto the far end of the couch.

"What the….hell was that…." I gasped for breath panicked, my body flustering in all kinds of heat and confused.

He stared at me with those big gold eyes of his, as if he was just as surprised as I was. This time I was sure I saw tears. "I…." he looked away bitterly. "I'm sorry….you don't, do you? That's just my luck…." He stood up abruptly "If you'll excuse me-"

"NO!" I grabbed his arm yanking him back to the couch. "Don't use that excuse on me again! I want an answer for that RIGHT NOW."

He remained silent, as if he'd suddenly become mute. I could feel the heavy pulse of his heart through his wrist and the tightness of his muscles to the point he shook. Then he relaxed. "It's nothing. I just haven't been called that in….a long time." He smiled weakly "Let just forget about it."

"You just kissed me. You KISSED ME. There must have been a reason! And you put your tongue in my mouth…." I narrowed my eyes.

"I already told you." He said quietly, looking into my eyes for a second before shifting them away. "We should get dressed. We're meeting Sheryl and Road in an hour at his wife's house and he asked for you to come as well. You should hurry."

"I'm not letting you change the subject. Since when is your name Adam, and why-" he cut me off.

"Later. MAYBE." He said. "Let's just leave it as something I had wanted to try for a while for now." He smiled a little as he walked away. "and maybe just succeeded a little."

"Hey wait what do you mean by succeeded?!" I chased him up the stairs, but he just laughed. He didn't answer any of my questions no matter how much I prodded him about it.

I ended up just laying in my room wondering what the hell had just happened to me. I knew from that moment things where never going to be the same around here. Not by a long shot.

Our ride to Sheryl's wife's house was another awkward silence, and it didn't get better when we got there. Sheryl talking about marriage with me again though was almost a relief compared to the previous afternoon, but I wasn't in the mood for his girlyness.

Lucky for me though, Road had chosen earl, or _Adam_ I suppose, as her target instead of me. She seemed unsurprised at seeing him human, and I began to wonder whether I was the ONLY one who didn't know. Maybe the whole thing was a joke and they'd just hired some guy off the street. I wouldn't be surprised considering my family.

I hadn't been paying much attention. Sheryl had been going on and on to Adam how I had my pick of women and whether I was allowed to get married. He just wouldn't quit on the subject.

"Fine with me, if he's willing." Adam replied, smirking a little as he peered at me from behind the brim of his hat.

"I think not." I glared at him and Sheryl. I didn't want him involved in this issue to, and something about him agreeing made my skin crawl. It was odd, he was acting like nothing had happened earlier.

"What are you guys talking about?" Road said, running up to me.

I looked at her mockingly "About cutting this annoying hair of yours."

"No like it!" she screamed "if you cut it I'll kill you!" She pounded on my chest, hitting one of my scars.

I grimaced as the pain jolted through my body.

"Does it hurt where Allen cut you?" she looked up concerned.

I smirked back through the pain. "Worried?"

After that the rest of the afternoon took a turn for the serious side of things; I would occasionally chime in here and there, but it was mostly a review on all that had happened in our last battle with the exorcists. The only curious thing was the 14th, and it seemed it was a touchy subject.

As it turns out he had been one of us; More surprisingly though, he had tried to take us over by killing Adam. He was clearly a threat, but it bothered me I didn't remember him. You'd think you would remember someone who had killed you in a past life, along with all of your kin. Maybe my memories really where messed up. Thankfully Sheryl didn't know much either, and that put my mind at ease.

It wasn't long before it was time to leave, and I debated whether it was worth it to stay at the family house tonight or not. At first I thought I might stay with Road and Sheryl, but I quickly realized I wouldn't be able to sleep if I stayed. On top of that it seemed that Adam was off somehow. Ever since the pianist was mentioned a deathly silence had crossed over him that seemed unnatural considering his usual upbeat and eccentric attitude. I was still waiting for an answer to this morning as well. He wasn't getting out of it, but I sure as hell wasn't gonna mention it around the rest of the family.

We headed outside and back into our vehicle, and he stared idly out the window as we headed home.

"Now who's acting strange?" I said.

"Is it strange to be quiet?" he said emotionlessly.

"For you, yes." I looked over at him. "You where bouncing off the walls this morning, then you where crying, then you where normal again like nothing happened, and now your acting like someone put your pet in a blender and made you watch."

He laughed bitterly "Well I guess when you wear a mask all the time you forget how obvious emotions can be if you don't pay attention. I wouldn't expect you to remember why I'm upset." We stopped abruptly.

"If you'll excuse me, Tyki, there's someone I have to see. I'll be back in a few minutes." He exited out the door into the light rain outside.

As he walked away from me I looked at how diligent he was, as if he were struggling to walk with chains around his ankles. I had never seen this side of my brother. For the first time since I'd found out I really believed it was real.

_"He's human after all." I thought. "When you act like that you don't look like the villain who's made the world his enemy, Earl."_

**_"__Outside the rain's fallin' down  
There's not a drop that hits me  
Scream at the sky but no sound  
Is leavin' my lips  
It's like I can't even feel  
After the way you touched me  
I'm not asleep but I'm not awake  
After the way you loved me."_**

**-Sleepwalker(Adam Lambert)  
**

**Read more: Adam Lambert - Sleepwalker Lyrics | MetroLyrics **


	4. Chapter 4-Anniversary(extra chapter)

_**"Couldn't save you from the start**_  
_**Love you so it hurts my soul**_  
_**Can you forgive me for trying again**_  
_**Your silence makes me hold my breath**_  
_**Time has passed you by**_

_**Oh, for so long I've tried to shield you from the world**_  
_**Oh, you couldn't face the freedom on your own**_  
_**Here I am left in silence**_

_**You gave up the fight**_  
_**You left me behind**_  
_**All that's done's forgiven**_  
_**You'll always be mine**_  
_**I know deep inside**_  
_**All that's done's forgiven."**_

**-Forgiven(Within Temptation)**

Adams POV (extra chapter)

Everything seemed so messed up.

I headed towards the grave yard, twirling the deep red roses stem between my fingers. It stuck through my glove as I did so, crimson blood dripping from my hand. I remained silent as I went down the worn path; It was rare I came to a place like this for personal reasons.

The rain had stopped, but the heavy grey clouds still hung over head, a cool breeze blowing through early spring air. It was the anniversary of many things today. Many things that made the human half of me want to curl up by the head stone I now found at my feet.

"It's been a year, like I promised." I smiled weakly. "Not that you care….you never kept yours.".

On the stone read the name Neah Walker, no age or death written beneath. It was fairly unspectacular, but we never made apparent the death of a family member. Despite its simplicity I felt a rush of emotions over me making my body tremble with pain. This was the grave of the only person I couldn't get back.

"Neah…." Tears began to stream down my face. A voice whispered in my head-

_ "I lied."._

A sob broke out from my lips. I didn't want to think about that day, the day I ended it. I told myself I had no choice, that I had to protect my family and the people I loved, but it was just an excuse. I would have done anything to save him- If I could have. The idea that he had picked a successor, and an exorcist no less, did not sit well in my chest where my heart had once belonged either. Still, I felt there was something eerily familiar about Allen, and even in staring at Neah's grave I was lost in thought at why I hadn't killed him. Was there something….more? Was I missing something? But these where just background thoughts to the sorrow and guilt I was feeling. This was my day to let go and feel the full weight of my mistakes. The real question was what they were, and why I had made them.

I cried over the headstone for a while, unable to make words or coherent thoughts. About ten minutes in a little girl came over to me that had lost her brother the week before. Ironically enough her father was now one of my akuma, but still she looked at me concerned.

"Are you alright? I know it's hard losing someone, mister, but they'd want you to live on." She smiled at me and hugged me. "I know you'll be ok. I made it when my big bro died."

I couldn't help but laugh a little in dark humor through my tears.

"Something funny mister?" she pulled away a bit.

"Oh nothing…. I'm just wondering" I looked up "why aren't there more humans that think that way? If there where….maybe this planet wouldn't be the unholy mess that it is." I laughed a bit more "You should keep it up." I looked directly at her. "It's a rare gift, to be sentient."

She tilted her head. "I don't know what you mean, but I hope that you feel better soon." The girl walked away back to the far edge of the graveyard leaving me alone with Neah again.

I sat there for a few minutes, and then placed the rose at the headstone.

"I should probably get going Neah. My brothers probably mad at me." I looked at the grave wearily "I still love you. You can't ever change that, no matter how much you want me dead."

As I walked away and back to the street I saw our vehicle at the side of the road waiting for me, Tyki's silhouette in the back.

"Besides" I whispered under my breath. "You're not the only anniversary today, Neah" I smiled a bit. "There's still one more I need to make apparent today."


	5. Chapter 5- Slip of the Hand

Tyki's POV (unless otherwise stated)

I waited impatiently in the car, tapping my fingers on the glass, the rain finally stopping from outside the vehicle.

_"What takes this long?" _I thought, irritated that my older brother had been gone for nearly an hour.

Sitting there passively though, I couldn't get what had happened early out of my head. It might not be bothering him, but it was bugging the hell out of me, and the silence in the car wasn't helping. I could still feel the heat on my lips where our skin had touched.

I laid down across the seats, feeling rather strange as I thought about it. If I hadn't stopped him, how far would it have gone? Absent mindedly, I felt my own hand slipping to my crotch, wrapping around my shaft. I pulled it away instinctively.

"No, no I am NOT masturbating to that! What is wrong with me?" my face flushed. "It's not like that, there must be another explanation." I stared at the roof till a sudden noise jolted me upright.

"Your awfully jumpy." Adam remarked, nudging me back other to my side of the vehicle. "What have you been up to?"

I glared. "Nothing." I looked out the other side of the car hiding my face."You've just been gone for an hour when you said you'd be back in ten minutes. I had just assumed someone had killed you, that thought is quiet relieving, actually."

He shrugged the comment off "if I died you'd never get your questions answered, now would you Tyki-pet?".

He seemed back to normal, but he kept his eyes away from me, the outsides red from what I assumed had been crying.

"Don't. Call. Me. That. It's fucking creepy." I turned away from him flustered with being called by that pet name. "Who did you go to see, anyway?" I questioned.

He looked back at me curiously "Why do you ask?"

"BECAUSE YOUVE BEEN GONE FOR A FU-…."i calmed down realizing this was exactly how he wanted me to react. I took a deep breath. "because you've been gone so long, seinen- kun."

"You really are pissed at me aren't you?" he looked down. "If you must know, an ex-lover. That's all I'm at liberty to say I'm afraid."

_"Ex- lover?"_I queried. _"When did he….?"_He looked over at me.

"From the look on your face I can tell that confuses you greatly. Trust me, it's nothing you need to worry yourself about." He smiled sadly. "the point is that's in the past now. There's nothing I can do about it."

The vehicle started to move, and we headed home. Once again, no talking occurred as we trudged forward. The tension in the tiny cabin we shared could have been cut with a knife. By the time we got out the sun was setting, the sky a bright fevered red as the stars creeped overhead. I felt the wind brushing across my pale grey skin, a calmness returning for a moment in the cool night air. Earl looked back at me, gesturing me forward.

"Are you going to space out or come inside?" he asked.

I shook off the momentary feeling of relief to be brought from bright red to deep gold, contrasting against the black sky behind him. I tore my eyes away.

"Yeah I'm coming…." I trudged inside after him.

He looked back at me "Well, I better change cloths and get something to eat before I leave." He stretched his arms.

"Leave? Where are you going?" I narrowed my eyes.

"My job, what else? Or rather I would be if the egg hadn't _broken_…." He looked away clearly pissed off. "Now I have to go out and _fix_ the bloody thing, and you have no idea how painstaking that is." He walked up the stairs to his room.

"Hey wait!" I called from the living room, but he just continued on like I hadn't said anything. "Asshole…."I hissed under my breath. He called from upstairs.

"Heard that."

"Fuckin-curse his selective hearing…." I groaned. Even though I was 26 he still treated me like I was 2.

A couple minutes later I went up the stairs to follow. He owed me an explanation, and he wasn't going anywhere until he did. Still as I stood in front of his door I had a nagging feeling that this was a really bad idea.

_"Too late now."_I thought, opening the door.

To my relief he had already changed into his undershirt, doing up the last few buttons. He looked over at me nonchalantly.

"Do you need something?" he didn't even look up at me.

"You know what I want." I replied. "I'm not letting you leave until you tell me why you did that this morning."

He raised an eyebrow "did what?"

I glared "You know _damn well _what you did."

He stepped closer "I'm sorry, elaborate Tyki-pet? I can't seem to recall."

I tightened my fists "You….KISSED me…." My face flushed again, even under my grey tint.

"Oh that's right I did didn't I?" he smirked "Does that _bother _you Tyki?"

"Yes it does you perverted clown! I-I don't like it!" I stammered, which I rarely did. I could never keep a level head with him taunting me.

"You don't?" he got even closer, only inches away now "I'd say the color of your cheeks says different. You've been awfully interested in my reason, how do you know it wasn't just because I was bored, or as you put it, a _pervert." _he tried to brush some hair out of my face and I smacked his hand away.

"Because you're my brother and I don't like MEN!" I yelled, and as I was about to continue I found both my hands pinned over my head. He leaned close and whispered darkly in my ear.

"We both know that's a lie." He rubbed the front of my crotch with his spare hand. I squirmed trying to escape.

"You fucking sicko!" I tried to kick him away and remove his hand from my genitalia before anything else could happen.

Unfortunately for me my brother had always been stronger than me. We where both the same heightand I was not weak by any stretch of the imagination, but his build was broader and more muscular than my own. Trying to struggle against him was like trying to fight against a brick wall and as I soon came to realize, a much different consistency than his inhuman form. His hands dug into the flesh of my wrist, and the more I struggled the more blood they drew. Normally I would just use choice to escape, but I knew very well from past experience it had no affect on _him._ I tried anyway, and to my dismay I ended up going part way through the wall only to be yanked back even closer to him. My body grew hotter with panic.

"Just let me go! What are trying to do here Earl?!" I yelled.

"Isn't it obvious?" He replied, only to start biting and licking at the delicate flesh of my neck.

"Nh- E-Earl! Quit it! I don't-Ah!" I blushed furiously, angry at the fact that I couldn't break away. He moved his hand from my crotch and up my shirt, pinching at my nipples.

_"I don't like this, I don't like this! I don't like men, I DEFINATLY don't like HIM. This has to stop, I can't let him do this…I'll never live it down." _I bit down hard on my lip, trying not to cry out again.

"Aw you stopped making noise Tyki-pet~" he continued with my neck and I bit down harder. "Guess I'll have to go lower." He smirked.

His hand returned to my crotch, slowly unzipping the front and pulling them down to my ankles. He slipped his hand under the waist band and starting caressing my cock.

"Ah-Adam!Oi! Stop this now! I don't-" he gripped around the shaft of my newly erect dick, no matter how much I told it to stay down. He began to pump and a moan escaped my lips through gritted teeth.

"That's better, just a little less restrained." He pushed me onto the bed, pumping faster. At this point I was to gone to struggle anymore, and his hand loosened on my wrists. He put it up to his mouth, licking his fingers seductively before slipping them down to my entrance. My back arched and a deeper moan escaped as he slipped the first finger inside.

"You're pretty tight ya know that, Tyki? I bet you've never been penetrated by anything." He pumped his finger.

"No-w-why woULD….ahh…i…." I responded, though barely there anymore. He slipped two more inside, using two of them to stretch out my hole. I yelped in pain "Adam- AH! That hurts!"

He licked his lips "No one said it was pain free, Tyki- pet" he slipped down lower "Still I suppose I owe you for stopping struggling so much." he licked at my head, shivers rolling down my spine as he did so, pumping his fingers more rapidly before he started to deep throat.

"Ah-oh fuck AH! Nh- im going t-to C-AH-UM!" I cried out arching my back even further.

He continued, pumping his fingers deeper and finishing me before I knew it. I collapsed back onto the bed exhausted. He sat up, licking my juices off his lips.

"See, that wasn't so bad. I told you that you where lying." He smiled, though not in the cocky way he usually did.

I closed my eyes trying to imagine I was somewhere else "That….did NOT just happen…." I opened them slightly, his body arching over mine, gold eyes meeting gold.

"I'm afraid it did." He kissed the top of my head. "I just can't stand you lying to yourself, you see. It's unfair." He shook his head. "Still for your tolerance of me, I'll give you a hint to your question. You've always liked men Tyki. Nothing will ever change that."

I looked away too tired to be pissed "that's not of much help…."

"It's more than you think." Earl replied. "Maybe if you admit you enjoyed it I'll give you more~"

"Like hell I will!" I buried myself under the blankets, hiding another blush.

_"Still…." _I thought _"Maybe I did enjoy myself, if only a little….but I can never tell him that. Not in a thousand years."_

He patted my head from under the blanket "Well, now that we're done I should get going…." He shifted on the bed.

I peered from under the blanket "Oh you just leave me after you did that to me? I figured from someone like you."

"Now now Tyki, I'll be back to finish the job, don't be so eager." He slapped my ass causing me to yelp again rather effeminately "Unless you want me to stay and sleep here with you…."

My mind almost considered it for a second before shaking my head rapidly "NO. Just go…." I trailed off. He shrugged and headed towards the door. Just before he left I spoke up.

"Hey, Earl."

"Yes, Tyki-pet?" he replied rather smugly.

"Don't tell anyone about this….." I looked away.

"I won't." he smiled. "Not until you're willing to admit it to yourself."

"Good….I'd have to castrate you otherwise…." I went back under the blankets.

"Whatever you say…." He headed out the door and into the night.


	6. Chapter 6- Memorys

_ It was the dead of night, and only the cool moonlight allowed us to see one another. Myself, Sheryl, Toriado, Wisely, and Adam where the only ones here. _

_ "So what should we do about what happened to Wisely?" Sheryl complained, gesturing to the burn marks and broken bones of the youngest of our group. "They could have killed him!"_

_ Wisely shrank back nervously behind Toraido, unsure what his role was here after the brutal beating he had just endured not 2 days ago. _

_ Adam looked away, as if the moon would give him answers. "I don't know, ok? I know we can't let this keep happening but it's not that simple." He was tense. He might have been the oldest, but not by much. We were just a group of guys in their late teens, dealing with the recent loss of both our parents._

_ "Well, maybe we should strike back!" Sheryl said "We need to show them we can't be pushed around! My Road could be next if they'd go after wisely." _

_ Wisely shook his head furiously "That will just make them more afraid of us for not being human, they'll kill us in our sleep…." He whined. "We need to show them we're just like them." _

_ Adam looked at Wisely calmly "You're good at heart Wisely, but we've all been trying to do that since the day you were born. They won't accept us no matter what. I'm afraid Sheryl is right, though we're not strong enough, and he put it in a rather hasty and barbaric way…."_

_ Toriado spoke up, which he rarely did, keeping his eyes to the ground. "I wish dad where here…."_

_ "But he's not…." Sheryl said. "We have to take action."_

_ I looked over at Sheryl. "But what you plan will get us all killed. It's not going to make our lives any easier. I hate to say it but unless someone's got an ace up their sleeves we have to go….we can't stay here."_

_ Everyone looked down solemnly, unsure what to do. We were afraid. _

_ "But if we leave, more will come." Toriado said emotionlessly. _

_ Silence again._

_ "but…." Sheryl raised his head. "What if we….could talk to dad?" _

_ Wisely glared "Talk to dad that's crazy! He's dead….there's nothing we can do about what happened. Joido's right lets go." _

_ "But you forget." Sheryl replies "we have an alchemist among us, one that has done such things before." _

_ Everyone's eyes went to Adam, and he looked back stubbornly. "Is that really what you want from me? Bringing back moms soul on rare occasions is one thing, and it still drains my life by months at a time just for an hour, but bringing back a damned man for power, are you sure?" _

_ "What other choice do we have?" Sheryl questions. "They said they would come for us in 3 days." He got close to my brother "Besides you have a talent for it! Most people die on the slightest attempt at human sorcery, it's a sign. This is meant to happen." He grinned. _

_ Adam glared "I know very well what powers the dead can bring, but there is ALWAYS a price. We can't just ask for advice from him for such a high tole." _

_ "I doubt dad will hurt us with a curse, why would he?" Sheryl asked._

_ "It's not about cursing, it's about equivalence. Here the weight in my words. This is a bad idea."Adam replied._

_ Toraido piped in "If we did, who would get this power anyway?" _

_ Sheryl boasted "Me of course, it was my plan."_

_ I glared "like hell you will Sheryl. Dad would rather pick me." Despite my nervousness I wanted to get back at the humans just as much. Having some awesome unthinkable power would be nice, despite the risk. _

_ "I think I'm the least likely to abuse it…." Toraido stated. _

_ We all argued until Adam stepped in._

_ "SILENCE!" he yelled teeth bared. "I am the oldest, I have my alchemy, I'll talk to Noah."_

_ "But we-" Sheryl was cut off._

_ "You don't know what you're doing, what you're messing with. If he requests you I'll let you know." Adam said._

_ "….but you already have alchemy." Wisely chimed._

_ "Which is exactly why this is MY responsibility. I've already had power over normal humans. I know how to control myself." He explained._

_ I looked at him skeptically "But your depressed, obsessive about appearance, completely mad and most importantly you can't even keep food down."_

_ Adam glared and grabbed my collar "You shut up about my Bulimia you asshole! More importantly I'm more suited than a gutter tramp nobody that ran away for a few years cause he couldn't take "the pressure" of living at home. I've raised every damn member of our family cause dad was never here and mom was sick all the time! Even though I'm your fucking brother I never had the TIME to be as immature as all of you!" _

_ Everyone was shocked. He never yelled at us like that, and now that I thought about it, he was right. Come to think of it, I couldn't even remember what my father looked like. Suddenly he collapsed to his knees and I rushed over, followed by Sheryl. His eyes where flowing over with tears._

_ "….just get off me…." He gritted his teeth. _

_ We backed off. Sheryl was the first to speak._

_ "….your right. We'll back off." He looked down defeated. "When should we prepare for summoning?"_

_ "You won't be." He replied. "I'm going tonight, alone. I'll meet you in the morning with the outcome; we have no time to lose."_

_ Sheryl nodded and turned away to leave, along with Wisely and Toriado. I hung back as they left into the dark._

_ "I sorry." I said looking away._

_ "I'm sorry." Adam smiled sadly. "I know that's not the reason you left." _

_ "But it is what you told everyone, isn't it?" I looked back at him nervously._

_ "Yeah." He wiped the tears stains from his face with his sleeve. "I figured, since it was a mistake after all."_

_ "but it wasn't." I thought. That's why I ran. _

_ He reached over to me and wiped away some of my own tears. "Your still a little kid you know that, crying over misjudgments." He smiled. "It's not like it matters, a mistake like that, right? That is what we said when you came back."_

_ "yeah I know…." I hugged my brother briefly, burring my head in his chest and taking in his scent. "just don't get killed or something stupid like that."_

_ He laughed a bit "I'll be fine." His green eyes flickered under his blond bangs and he hugged me back. "Don't worry I'll be home in the morning."_

_ "I know, you don't have to say it again." I turned and walked away back to the house. Little did I realize that would be the last time I would see him human for years to come._

I woke up feeling a twinge of guilt in my stomach. I opened my eyes tiredly and buried myself deeper under the blankets.

_"It's really cold." _I thought. I didn't want to get up until I remembered whose room I was in.

"Holy shit-" I said falling out of the bed, covering my lower parts with the blanket, desperately looking for my pants and underwear. I see a shadow at the door.

"Looking for something?" Road twirled my underwear around her finger, smiling cruelly.

"This is not what it looks like…." Outside I kept calm but inside I was panicked.

_ "She can't find out about last night she can't!" I thought._

I quickly ran over to road, keeping the blanket over my junk. "Give it back." I grabbed for the underwear, but she put it beyond my reach.

"Ah-ah-ah." She taunted. "First the story, then you get your underwear."

"Why are you even here road?! This isn't even your house!" I exclaimed.

"I come here all the time, lessons and all. I get bored in the house with Sheryl all day can you blame me?"

I looked away a bit pissed. _"You SHOULD be at school." _I thought bitterly.

"Well he is terrible…." I admitted "anyway there's no story to tell, nothing happened." I said keeping my eyes steady.

"oh? Then explain away tyki-chan~" she grinned "I'd love to see you get out of this one."

I smacked myself in the face mentally. _"what do I tell her?" _I thought up an excuse quickly.

"my rooms under construction." I said nonchalantly "it's been messed up ever since the ark was re-created and I got sick of sleeping on the couch so I came in here. Is that strange to you?"

"That you'd risk coming in HIS room, yes. You know how he is if you wake him up." She went back to looking evil "That still doesn't explain your underwear."

I looked away for a moment panicked. "i- um….was hot. I just took them off so I could cool down is all."

"and your shirt?" she pointed.

"so I wanted to keep my shirt on what's the problem with that?" I asked emotionlessly.

"It's a bit strange to go pants before shirt unless you're fooling around…." She purred.

"That's NOT it! It's just…." I looked down, seeing the brim of one of the many scars Allen had given me. "….my scars where….bothering me…."

Roads eyes suddenly turned sympathetic. "You're not having trouble with your Noah-hood are you?" she asked.

"No….but I've been having strange dreams ever since that I can never remember." I replied, giving her pieces of the truth to get her off my trail.

"Dreams?" she said curiously "they could be memories, I can help!" she smiled ecstatically, tackling me even though I still didn't have pants. I struggled to keep the blanket between her and I.

"That's not necessary, I don't need your help." I pushed her off. "Now give me back my pants."

"But tyykkkiiii~" she complained. "I just wanna help for once."

"and let you wander about my brain unguarded? I think not." I glared, grabbing my clothing from her hand.

"You're no fun tyki!" she stuck her tongue out at me then ran out the room.


End file.
